Inspired or Not

After reading someone else's blog, i thought i might get serious (whatever that might mean) about doing mine. I got rid of the old one and have started this one.

What is it i wish for more than anything else? Perfection? Nah. Not so much. Just that God would be wholly honored and glorified in my life... in choices i make, in attitudes towards people and life, in my most secret desires, in my relationship with my wife and son, with the people God has given me to shepherd. There is so much within me... and so much without that seeks to pull me away and, with varying degrees of success, seem to prevail much of the time. To die in order to live. To become a servant in order to be blessed. To hold and own nothing in order to possess all. The dichotomies and contradictions are overwhelming. If it were limited to a few, perhaps i could manage. But a work of the Spirit... How else can i be what i ought, what i long to be.

Perfection... not flawless or error-less but mature. Lord, i believe. Help my unbelief.